As unbelievable as it sounds, the Drug Enforcement Agency has come up with the most ridiculous argument against marijuana legalization yet. You see, the State of Utah is considering a bill that would recognize the rights of patients with certain debilitating conditions to use medical marijuana – or, more accurately, to use marijuana medically.
The bill specifically promotes the use of edible forms of the plant, preferring it to smoking. This is, of course, fine for most who want to use the herb for medicine. But the DEA is freaking out…
That’s not surprising, since the bulk of DEA revenue is justified by marijuana entrapment and arrests.
If the bill passes, the DEA warns, the state’s wildlife may start to “cultivate a taste” for the herb. If this happens, they say that animals like rabbits – little bunny rabbits – might start to lose their natural inhibitions and fears of humans. This, in turn, could result in “an all time high” of animals, such as rabbits, losing their lives to humans.
Apparently, since the after school specials and Nancy Reagan’s “Just Say No” campaigns didn’t work, the DEA is trying to suggest that if you love legal weed, you had bunnies.
The DEA testimony presented to a Utah Senate panel last week (time stamp 58:00) claimed as much.
“I deal in facts. I deal in science,” Special Agent Matt Fairbanks claimed.
He’s a member of the “marijuana eradication” team in Utah. Other members of the same team, recently raided an okra garden, even though okra is perfectly legal… everywhere.
But Special Agent Fairbanks assure us he is a man of science.
“Personally, I have seen entire mountainsides subjected to pesticides, harmful chemicals, deforestation and erosion,” the DEA science man said. “The ramifications to the flora, the animal life, the contaminated water, are still unknown.”
He claimed more of his “scientific research” involved observing “rabbits” which he claims “had cultivated a taste for the marijuana…”
“One of them refused to leave us,” he added, “[so] we took all the marijuana around him, but his natural instincts to run were somehow gone.”
In spite of his “scientific” arguments, the Utah Senate panel approved the bill and sent it on to the full Senate. It will be debated later this week.

(Article by S. Wooten and Jackson Marciana)